This is a transcript for The Golden Puck, the eighteenth episode of season two of TMNT (2003 series).
| VOICE-OVER INTRO | |
| Casey Jones | What is it with people these days? Everywhere you turn, there are a bunch of bad dudes doing bad things. Like these mean hombres, chasing us, they wouldn't think twice about taking us out-- permanently. You see, they stole something very important to me and me and my green pals stole it back. Only now, we got these wack-bags trying to shoot us full of holes with their fancy laser rifles. They’ll run us off the road. Luckily, I'm a really good driver. [Donatello: Watch it, Casey!] |
{Opening sequence; title song}
| The episode begins at night in a hockey rink in Central Park. Snow covers the ground as it continues snowing. An announcer calls the play-by-play action. | |
| Announcer | What a night for Super Slam Hockey, folks! The Golden Grizzlies have the puck and are going for it. The game is tied at 3-3. The winning team gets ownership of the famed Golden Puck for a whole year, Super Slam Hockey’s greatest prize. [A hockey player knocks another one down.] He just got super slammed! And there’s the shot! Denied! [Crowd cheering.] Don’t forget folks, hang on to those ticket stubs. Three lucky winners at tonight’s game are going home with one of those gorgeous snowmobiles courtesy of Crazy Manny’s Winter Wonderland Depot. |
| Close-up of Crazy Manny with the three snowmobiles. | |
| Crazy Manny | I’m so crazy, I’m giving them away! |
| The rink action continues. | |
| Announcer | Whoa, Nellie! The Bowery Battlers have the puck. Looks like they’re going all the way! |
| Crowd | Super slam! Super slam! Super slam! |
| The players gets the puck in the net. | |
| Crowd | Goal! |
| Announcer | Goal! |
| Zoom in on Casey and the turtles sitting close to the rink and the Golden Puck trophy. The turtles wear hockey masks, gloves, coats, and scarves to disguise themselves. Michelangelo eats a bucket of nachos and Donatello reads an Encyclopedia of Hockey. | |
| Casey | Yeah! Super Slam Hockey’s gotta be the best sport known to man. |
| Leonardo | Or animals. I mean, don’t you think it’s kinda rough? |
| Raphael | Yeah! That’s what makes it so great. |
| Casey | You said it, Raph. To me, it’s the perfect evolution of a great sport. |
| Michelangelo | More importantly, the concessions are awesome. |
| He shoves nachos into his mouth and manages to drip some onto Donatello’s book. | |
| Donatello | Hey! |
| Raphael | The only think I don’t like is wearing these stupid masks. |
| Casey | What? Check it out. [He pulls his mask down over his face.] See? Do we look cool or do we look cool? |
| Leonardo | All those who think we look cool, say aye. |
| All | Nay. |
| Raphael | All those who think Casey is a complete and absolute bonehead. |
| All | Aye! |
| Raphael | The ayes have it, Case. You’re a bonehead. |
| Casey | Yeah, I’m the bonehead what go you guys these great seats. We’re so close to the Golden Puck you could almost reach out and touch it. The Golden Puck, made by... some old guy a really long time ago. |
| Donatello | Actually, it says that the Golden Puck was handcrafted for Frederick Henry, a prince in 17th-century Holland. He played a variation of an old Dutch game called “kolven”, which some believe to be an early version of ice hockey. |
| Casey | Like I said, some old guy a really long time ago. |
| A horn blares. | |
| Announcer | There’s the final buzzer, with the score 5 to 3. The Bowery Battlers win! |
| The hockey players skate off the ice. The shadow of a parahawk shows on the ice and the fans looks up. Three parahawks zip down towards the rink. | |
| Casey | Check out the fancy post-game show. |
| Raphael | A “post-game show”? |
| Leonardo | With military parahawks? Heads up, guys. Something’s not kosher here. |
| The parahawks land on the ice and the fabric wings disconnect. Three armed men drive their parahawks across the ice and begin shooting. The fans all yell and run, but Casey and the turtles stay put. | |
| Casey/Turtles | Huh? |
| Slim | Fellas, looks like some fans don’t wanna give up their box seats. |
| He holds up a hockey puck shaped explosive and activates it before throwing it towards the turtles and Casey. | |
| All | Huh? |
| The device explodes, shattering glass and smashing the stands. Crowds flee the hockey rink and spill out into Central Park. The men stop their parahawks and disembark to walk over to where the Golden Puck is lying on its side on the ice. | |
| Slim | There she is, boys. Now, y’all bag her and tag her. [The twins place the trophy into a sack.] Now let’s hit the trail, boys. We got all we came for. |
| They jump back into the parahawks, drive up the side of the ice rink, and jump over the top fencing and into the park. The rubble from the explosion moves, followed by grunts and groans as Casey digs himself out. He lifts his mask and looks for the turtles, but sees only rubble. | |
| Casey | Guys? Guys! |
| He digs through the rubble and yanks Leonardo and Raphael up by their coat collars. Michelangelo and Donatello dig out from the other side of the rubble pile. | |
| Donatello | What happened? |
| Casey | Oh, no! They took the Golden Puck! |
| Leonardo | It’s just a puck, Casey. Nobody was hurt. That’s what’s important. |
| Casey | Just a puck? Just a puck? It’s not just a puck, it’s a symbol. That Golden Puck comes from the beginning of ice hockey and carries us forward to the future of... ice hockey! [He grabs Leonardo by his scarf and shakes him.] Don’t you get it? It’s like stealing the Empire State Building or—or—or apple pie! |
| Michelangelo | They have apple pie here? |
| Casey | I gotta stop ‘em. |
| He dons his mask and runs off. | |
| Raphael | Think we should help Case? |
| Donatello | Getting the Golden Puck back feels more like something for the police to handle. |
| Leonardo | Yeah, but Casey might get hurt. |
| Raphael | Or worse, Casey might hurt somebody. |
| Michelangelo | Where’s the pie? I distinctly heard somebody say “pie”. |
| Crazy Manny slowly peeks up over the rim of the ice rink and then looks back at his snowmobiles. | |
| Crazy Manny | I don’t believe it! My snowmobiles, they’re all right! They’re... [Raphael jumps into the seat of one of the snowmobiles.] all right? [Raphael starts the engine and races up and over the side of the ice rink to enter Central Park.] My snowmobile! No! |
| Michelangelo takes another of the snowmobiles and Donatello rides behind Leonardo on the third as they too zip into Central Park. Crazy Manny starts sobbing. Raphael catches up to Casey, who’s running through the park. | |
| Raphael | Coming through! |
| Raphael passes him and then so does Leonardo. | |
| Michelangelo | Heads up, Casey! |
| Casey | Huh? |
| He stops and turns to see Michelangelo coming at him. Michelangelo catches Casey’s outstretched arm and pulls him onto the back of the snowmobile. | |
| Casey | Thanks for the lift, Mikey. Crank that throttle and let’s catch those goons. |
| The turtles close in on the thieves. | |
| Robby | We got a posse on our trail, Slim. |
| Bobby | But he’s gaining on us. What do we do, Slim? |
| Slim | Y’all follow me, ya’ hear? |
| They zoom towards a building. Raphael turns his snowmobile and takes a shortcut over a pile of snow, flying over a kissing couple seated on a park bench. The other two snowmobiles follow and disturb the couple. The parahawks slide to a stop and the three Texas Roughnecks hop off to leap down into the subway system. They arrive at the track just as a train comes to a stop. | |
| Subway Announcer | 59th Street Station. Next stop, Times Square. Stand clear of the closing doors. |
| Robby and Bobby enter the train. Slim opens a matchbox, takes out the last match and puts it between his teeth before entering the train. He tosses away the empty matchbox. Raphael drives his snowmobile down the steps as he races to catch them. Slim turns and sees him and then fires his rifle, hitting the snowmobile. Raphael jumps off just as the snowmobile explodes. The train door closes and the train takes off with the three smiling thieves. The others drive down the stairs and stop. | |
| Leonardo | Raph! Raph, you okay? |
| Leonardo and Donatello help him stand. Raphael groans. | |
| Raphael | Oh... |
| Michelangelo | He’s okay. |
| Sirens wail in the distance. | |
| Leonardo | We’d better make ourselves scarce. |
| Raphael | Hang on a second. [He reaches down and grabs the matchbook.] One of those yahoos tossed this. |
| Casey | What is it? |
| Raphael | A matchbox. [He reads.] “Compliments of... the Sierra Hotel.” |
| On a rooftop overlooking the Sierra Hotel, the turtles and Casey spy out the area. Michelangelo and Raphael uses tech binoculars to get a close-up view. | |
| Michelangelo | Hey, check it out! They’ve got free cable movie channels. |
| Casey | Let me see. |
| Leonardo | Stay focused, guys. |
| Raphael | Got him! [He spots Slim at a window.] There’s our man— Mr. Matchstick himself. Third floor, fifth room from the end. |
| The Texas Roughnecks stand waiting for an elevator inside the hotel. After the elevator door closes behind them, the turtles and Casey come out of hiding. | |
| Leonardo | Okay, they’re gone. |
| Casey | Why don’t we just ice those suckers? |
| Leonardo | We have to find that Golden Puck first. |
| Donatello | Yeah, Case. If they know that we’re onto them, it might ruin any chance we have of finding the stolen puck. [He takes an electronic device from his duffel bag. A blank key card on wires is attached to it.] But since they were nice enough to go out... |
| He slides the card into the reader and unlocks the hotel room door. The turtles and Casey enter the room and begin searching. | |
| Leonardo | It’s not here. |
| Raphael | Those cowpokes must have stashed it someplace else. |
| Donatello | We’ll have to follow them. I bet they’ll lead us right to it. |
| Cut to the corridor outside of the room. The elevator bell dings and opens to reveal the Texas Roughnecks returning. | |
| Slim | I can’t believe you left the keys to the van in the room, Robby. |
| Robby | Nuh-uh, Bobby’s what done it. |
| Bobby | I ain’t done it. You done it. |
| Robby | Nuh-uh, you done it. |
| Bobby | Did not. |
| Robby | Did too. |
| Slim slides his room key card into the reader. | |
| Bobby | Did not! |
| Casey and the turtles are headed towards the door when they hear the door handle and then see it turn. The door opens to reveal an apparently empty room. As it switches back to the three men, Raphael can be seen perched against the ceiling. | |
| Slim | Lights. |
| The lights come on. Casey is lying on the floor between the two beds, his head under the bedside table and his arms extended under the beds. Outside of the window are the other the turtles. | |
| Leonardo | Casey’s in the open. |
| Michelangelo | What a bonehead. Hang on. |
| He leaps from the window ledge onto another and opens a window to slip inside. | |
| Slim | Bobby, get the key and let’s go. |
| He points to the keys, which are sitting on the bedside table. Bobby gets close to Casey’s hiding spot and Casey gulps. A knock at the door makes Bobby stop and all three men turn with their rifles in hand. | |
| Slim | Robby, let’s see who’s come a-visiting. |
| They open the door. Michelangelo stands there, hidden behind a stack of towels. He addresses them in a high-pitched voice. | |
| Michelangelo | Housekeeping. More towels for you. |
| Slim | We don’t need no stinking towels. |
| He slams the door and knocks Michelangelo back, making him drop the towels. | |
| Michelangelo | Whoa! |
| The men turn and see the window curtains flapping. | |
| Slim | That window open before? |
| Robby | Don’t know. |
| Bobby | Think so. |
| Slim walks over to the open window. He passes the beds and Casey is no longer on the floor. Slim looks down and around without seeing Casey dangling above him, held up by Leonardo and Donatello. | |
| Slim | Just get the key and come on. The big man himself will be here any minute. |
| Down on the street, the Texas Roughnecks wait near the back of a van. Three black sedans approach and stop around them. The driver of one car opens the backdoor so that his passenger can get out. | |
| Mr. Arboost | Well, boys, y’all got what I asked you? |
| Robby and Bobby open the back of the van to reveal the Golden Puck. | |
| Slim | We got it, Mr. Arboost, but, uh, it cost a bit more than we figured. Had to ditch our parahawks. |
| Arboost | Well, you know me, boys. Money don’t mean a thing. Send me the bill, and add a little something for doing a fine job. |
| The turtles and Casey perch on the building and watch the exchange. | |
| Slim | Why, thank you, Mr. Arboost. This is my brother, Robby and my other brother, Bobby. You boys thank Mr. Arboost now. |
| Brothers | Thank you, Mr. Arboost. |
| Arboost | Boys, I can’t wait to see the faces on those suits when I tell ‘em I got their precious Golden Puck. Wouldn’t give me a Super Slam Hockey team. Said my image was all wrong. Well, so what if I just got out of jail? Big deal. I want a Super Slam Hockey team, and now I got me a golden bargaining chip. Ain’t that right, boys? |
| They all nod in agreement. | |
| Casey | Time to clock these clowns and get the Puck? |
| Leonardo | Yes. Time to clock these clowns and get the Puck. |
| As Arboost reaches for the trophy, Leonardo drops onto the street and startles him back. | |
| Arboost | What in tarnation? |
| Michelangelo swings into the van and Leonardo and Raphael slam the doors shut. They leap onto the top of the van and Leonardo grabs the keys. Donatello drops onto the street in front of Arboost and his hired men and clobbers all four of them with his bō, knocking them down. Casey falls from the building and hits the top of the van hard. | |
| Casey | Goongala! Ugh! |
| He bounces off the van and lands on the street. | |
| Leonardo | Casey, heads up! |
| Leonardo tosses him the keys and Casey gets behind the wheel and starts the van. Michelangelo sits in the back and clutches the trophy tightly. Donatello pole vaults across the top of the van and grabs the side of the van. Casey takes off, tires squealing. | |
| Arboost | After ‘em! After ‘em! |
| The three sedans start up and give chase. Donatello slips into the passenger seat while Raphael and Leonardo continue to cling to the roof. Arboost’s men pop up through the sunroof’s of the cars and open fire. | |
| Casey | Keep that Golden Puck safe, Mikey. It’s really old and stuff. |
| His evasive maneuvers toss Michelangelo from one side of the van to the other. | |
| Michelangelo | It’s- - oof- - not the- - ugh- - Golden Puck I’m worried about! Unh! |
| One of the sedans rear ends the van. | |
| Casey/Donatello | Whaa! |
| The sedan hits the van again, sending it into a tailspin. | |
| Raphael/Leonardo | Whoa! |
| Raphael loses his grip and falls. | |
| Raphael | Whoa! |
| Leonardo reaches down and grabs his wrist. Raphael dangles against the back of the van. Everyone gasps as Casey fights to control the van on the icy streets. Raphael looks back and sees a sedan racing right at him. It hits the van and Leonardo loses his grip on his brother. Raphael falls. | |
| Leonardo | Raph! No! Raph! |
| Raphael falls towards the sedan, flips over, and hits the trunk. He grunts and then leaps onto the hood. Drawing his sai, he spins it and smashes the glass with the pommel, striking the driver in the chest at the same time. | |
| Driver | Ooh! |
| The sedan slides to a stop, throwing Raphael off the hood. He flies backwards and Leonardo catches him. They both flip over to grip the van’s roof. The three sedans all crash into each other. The van escapes. Cut to an alley, where the van is now parked. | |
| Leonardo | Okay, we have the Golden Puck. Now let’s turn it over to the authorities and call it a night. |
| Casey | No way! Those goons are still out there. We gotta catch them and then teach them a lesson once and for all. |
| The radio crackles to life. | |
| Arboost | Jimmy, this is Mr. Arboost. You read? |
| Jimmy | Loud and clear. |
| Arboost | Jimmy, we need us some new transport. Pick us up at 3rd and 128th. |
| Jimmy | On our way. |
| Casey picks up the CB Radio’s microphone. | |
| Casey | I’ve got an idea. [He activates the mic.] Come on back, “Donny Bear”. We got us the Golden Puck and we’re taking it back to the Central Park so the authorities will find it right there where it was stolen. |
| He holds the mic up to Donatello. | |
| Donatello | Uh, that’s a big 10-4. [Cut to Arboost and his men, listening in.] Sounds like a great idea. |
| Slim | Mr. Arboost, those morons are broadcasting on our channel. |
| Arboost | Well, lucky for us. Now we know right where the Golden Puck’ll be. Saddle up, boys. I want that Golden Puck. |
| Cut to the hockey rink in Central Park. Casey places the Golden Puck back on its stand. He gives the turtles a thumb’s up and then relaxes against the stand. The turtles are crouched in hiding behind a barrier on the ice. | |
| Donatello | Remind me again why this was such a good idea. |
| Leonardo | It wasn’t a good idea. It was Casey’s idea. |
| Raphael | If this plan works, I’m gonna eat my shoe. |
| Michelangelo | We don’t wear shoes. [Raphael pops him on the head.] Ow! |
| They turn as a helicopter whirrs overhead. It lands on the ice in front of Casey. Mr. Arboost and his men are onboard. | |
| Arboost | Hand over the Golden Puck, son. |
| Casey | You’re gonna have to pry it from my cold, lifeless hands. |
| Arboost | All righty, then. Boys, open season on “Mr. Hero”. |
| Multiple rifle hammers click back. | |
| Casey | Hold on, hold on. There’s something I want you to know. I have friends. [He snaps his fingers and looks around when nothing happens.] I said, I have friends. |
| Still nothing happens and Casey groans. The turtles are all laughing. | |
| Leonardo | You think he’s, uh, sweated enough? |
| Casey | Hello? Friends? Remember? |
| Arboost | Now, son, you’re obviously plumb loco, so I don’t wanna waste any more time on you. [The turtles pop up and Leonardo waves at Casey.] What I do want is that Golden Puck. [Casey crosses his arms and grins.] And I always get what I want. |
| Casey | Well, I hope you want a whole heaping-helping of butt-whupping, ‘cause that’s what you’re gonna get. |
| Shouting, the turtles leap into action. | |
| Arboost | Open fire! |
| His men start shooting and Casey dives for cover behind the trophy stand. He reaches up and grabs the trophy. | |
| Casey | Yo, watch it with the Golden Puck! It’s really old and stuff. |
| Leonardo slices a rifle in half and then takes down a couple of men. | |
| Bobby | Slim, we’s under attack! |
| Robby | By some fellas in funny frog costumes! |
| Slim | Well, this is New York City, boys. |
| Brothers | Right. |
| The twins and another man rush at Leonardo. Raphael jumps off the side of the rink and slides down and across the ice on his shell. When he’s near the men, he stabs the ice with a sai and then spins around, knocking all of the men down. Slim fires at Michelangelo, who flips and jumps as he dodges every shot. | |
| Michelangelo | Nyah, nyah! |
| Donatello skates across the ice on his feet, taking men down. He skates up a ramp and then flips down between Robby and Bobby to knock them down. Casey address the trophy. | |
| Casey | You stay here out of trouble. I’ll be right back. [He grabs a handful of hockey sticks and jumps out onto the ice.] Yahoo! |
| Arboost | What the--? |
| Casey | Goongala! [He hits Slim hard and then tears into another group of men before tossing hockey sticks to the turtles.] Yo, fellas, catch! |
| Leonardo | Come on! |
| Robby helps a groaning Bobby try to rise. They look up and see Michelangelo and Donatello coming at them. Donatello leaps over them and Michelangelo rams into Bobby, throwing him into a wall. | |
| Bobby | Oof! Whoa-aa! |
| He groans and the two turtles slam into him again. He hits the ice. Raphael spins Robby around and then Leonardo knocks him down. | |
| Robby | Ugh! Oh. [His hat lands on the ice.] Aw! [He reaches for it, but Leonardo slides it away from him.] My hat! [Raphael slides up to Robby and splatters ice in his face.] Br-rr! [Michelangelo and Donatello lift him up.] Oh, no! [They slide up the wall with him.] Oh, no! Oh, no! Oh, no! No! No! [They slide up a ramp and then let him fly.] No-oo! O-ohh! |
| Raphael hits Robby’s hat and it flips through the air to land next to him. Both Robby and Bobby lay next to Casey’s feet. | |
| Casey | Whoo-hoo! [He looks around and sees Mr. Arboost making a run for it. Arboost reaches a dead end and turns to see Casey.] All right, “Boss Hogg”. Now you’re gonna learn what Slam Hockey’s all about. |
| Casey spins his hockey stick. Arboost pulls a gun, but Casey knocks it out of his hand. | |
| Arboost | Huh? Now—now—now, now, hold on, son. I—I’m sure we can make a deal. |
| Casey | Deal with this! |
| He clobbers Arboost and sends him sliding across the ice. Arboost lands in the net and a horn blares. Casey and Raph clasp hands. | |
| Casey | Super Slam Hockey. It’s the best. |
| The police haul away the thieves while Casey and the turtles watch from the bushes outside the hockey rink. | |
| Casey | Thanks, guys. Saving the Golden Puck meant a lot to me. |
| Raphael | Forget about it, Case. |
| Donatello | But check out the final score. |
| Leonardo | Ninja Turtles and Casey Jones, seventeen. |
| Raphael | Texas yahoos, zip. |
| Casey and Raphael clasp hands again. | |
| Casey | Turtles and Jones rule! |
| All | Yeah! Aha! You know it! |
| Michelangelo | I never did get any pie. Where was that stinking pie anyway? |
{Roll end credits}
